One summer night in 1981, my high school girlfriend and I took a walk on Hampton beach after our senior prom, and I asked her to marry me. She said, “Yes.” I was sixteen years old. In fact, my dad had to sign for the financing for the engagement ring from Zales jewelers, because I was not old enough to sign legally myself.
When I look back on it now, I am shocked. What was I thinking? Who makes that kind of a decision at that age? If any of my boys came to me at sixteen and asked me the same thing, I would have replied, “Absolutely not! Are you crazy?” I am so blessed my dad’s reply was different. How could I have possibly known this was the one for me? I did not. God did. IN Genesis 2:18, God says, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” God goes on to make all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. Now, God is God. He is all-powerful. He created the universe – the sun, moon and stars. He created the earth, the land, sea, and sky. God could have made whatever or whomever He wanted for the man, but after making all the animals and birds, the Bible says in verse 20, “…still there was no helper just right for him.” God then made woman. She is the only one, in His infinite wisdom, who is just right for man. “This explains,” Genesis 2:24 tells us, “why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” Here, God creates marriage. One man. One woman for life.
Since sin entered the world after the fall, humans have decided to redefine marriage, but it is quite clear. The woman is the only one God created to be “just right” for the man, and they are united into one as husband and wife in the relationship called marriage.
I do not know why I was in such a hurry to be married. Renée was not pregnant. I was not in the service getting ready to ship off overseas. I really cannot explain it. I just knew. God had created her as the one who was “just right” for me, and thirty-nine years later, this Saturday, October 10, it seems as if He was right. Imagine that. God was right. Surprise!
I would be lying if I said these past thirty-nine years were all wedded bliss.
No. Marriage is work. Sometimes it is very hard work, because all marriages are
made up of two sinners. As 1 John 1:8 reminds us, “If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not
living in the truth.” Because of this, husbands and wives push each other
to the limits of our forgiveness, mercy, and grace. We are all called, as the Bible
says, to, “Make allowance for each
other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave
you, so you must forgive others” (Colossians 3:13). Especially, with those
to whom we made vows and promises of love and devotion before God. It is not always easy, but worth the work.
If you are struggling in your marriage right now, keep trying. Lord knows what I put Renée through over the past thirty-nine years. Pray through Colossians 3:13. When the two of you have Christ at the center of your relationship, you can overcome anything. If you are still looking, be patient. Remember, Abraham had to wait until he was one hundred years old before his son Isaac was born. Don’t worry. Like this Adam, and the first Adam, God made someone just right for you too.
And, a very happy anniversary to my honey bunches of oats!
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