Happy Birthday Dad

Last Sunday was Father’s Day and I want to thank all of the dads out there who are stepping up to be a positive influence in the lives of their children. I do not believe nurturing children is a natural ability for men. That’s not really how God designed things. In Genesis 3, after the fall, God says to Eve, “I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth” (Genesis 3:16). Women were the ones obviously designed to have babies. In the Bible, the mom is the primary caregiver of children until they are “weaned,” which means until they no longer need breast milk. According to Jewish rabbinical traditions, weaning could take place anywhere between eighteen months and five years of age. It was then Jewish custom to celebrate. For, a weaned child has survived the fragile stage of infancy and can now eat solid food rather than breastfeed from his or her mother. In Genesis 21:8, we read, “When Isaac grew up and was about to be weaned, Abraham prepared a huge feast to celebrate the occasion.” As a result of this reality, children were very close to their mothers for nearly the first five full years of life. We love our moms. I love mine. 

Dads had a different job. They were to protect and provide. God tells Adam in Genesis 3:17-19, “All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it. It will grow thorns and thistles for you, though you will eat of its grains. By the sweat of your brow will you have food to eat.”

That dynamic survived largely intact for thousands of years. Dads went off to work, moms raised the children. As a result, the “nurturing” aspect of a dad’s character was often left underdeveloped. It’s not that dads didn’t love their children. Abraham certainly loved Ishmael and Isaac. Jacob loved his children, particularly Joseph. It’s just that the day-to-day responsibility fell largely to mom. I’m not sure that has changed all that much.

This does not mean dads are unimportant. An absent dad is significantly destructive in the life of a child. U.S. DOJ statistics reveal that children from homes where a father is not present account for: 63% of youth suicides, 90% of all homeless and runaways, 85% of all children who exhibit behavioral disorders, 71% of all high school dropouts, 70% of juveniles in state-operated institutions, and 75% of adolescent patients in substance abuse centers.

If you had a dad that may not have been cuddly, tender, and affectionate, but who left for work every day and made sure a roof was over your head and food on the table, you were blessed. My dad turns eighty-five years old today and I know my two brothers and I count ourselves blessed. We were not wealthy, but we never worried about housing or where our next meal was coming from. My dad made sure his sons were provided for and we are so grateful for that. If you had or have a dad who also tossed the ball with you, took you fishing, and coached your little league team, you are exceedingly blessed.

If you are a dad, God has wisdom to share with us, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). “Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it” (Proverbs 22:6). “Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged” (Colossians 3:21).

Yes, dads, we are to provide for our families, but we can always be better with hugs and words of encouragement. Let your sons and daughters know how precious they are to you and how much you love them.  

They may not “get us” right now, but they will eventually. Mark Twain once said, “When I was seventeen, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was twenty-four, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just seven years.”

Happy Father’s Day, dads! And Happy birthday dad.

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Remember you can email praises and petitions to southchurchprayer@gmail.com. I lift them up every Wednesday at 4:00 pm on Facebook Live.